Eye Roll Please...

It's freakin cold here.  I mean it was - 42 at the bus stop this morning.  Maybe it's the extreme cold or maybe I'm just a snarky, sarcastic woman, but some of the headlines lately have had me rolling my eyes.  (ok, ok, we know it's not the cold affecting me, I've never been known as "the girl with the sunny disposition!")

• Alaska man charged with attacking snowplow with an ax    Really?!  Who wants to place odds on who won?  My money's on the snow plow, but if Spike TV's Deadliest Warrior has anything to do with it, then the ax will win by some asinine theory.
• Alaska DMV giving Troops break on car registrations  So Troops coming home from a year long deployment can now get a 15 day pass so they will not get tickets for expired tags.  "Gov. Sean Parnell says this is a "common-sense way" to show appreciation to the military personnel."  Uh, no.  Common sense says waiting 10 YEARS in to this damn war is a little late, moron!
• More Sandusky/Penn State scandal   In the e-mail obtained by The Morning Call newspaper of Allentown, Pennsylvania, McQueary said that he helped stop the assault and talked with police about it. "I did stop it, not physically, but made sure it was stopped when I left that locker room," McQueary wrote in the November 8 e-mail to a former classmate. This guy is total slime.  You didn't stop it physically means you didn't stop it asshole!  Also, there is no record of you ever reporting it to police!
  
  
  No more news for me today.  I've had my fill.
  
  

Crazy kid games

You know there is something wrong with our society when these are the new games for kids this holiday season (and yes these are real and available at the toy store):

Pig Out Pete

As Pete moves around the room, he makes funning sounds and throws up plastic food. Players must match the food that Pete throws up with the same colored food that each player has in the Gunk tray.

Doggie Doo

 

Feed and walk your little pup, if he makes a mess you clean it up! When you squeeze his leash he makes a gassy sound that gets louder and louder until...plop. The first to clean up after the dog three times wins.

Flush

Players must capture the creatures with their headband plunger and then flip them into the toilet, while the toilet is turning on its swiveling base. Work fast before the toilet flushes!The most fun you've ever had with the toilet!

Wish I had a magic wand

Joanna has trashed her room again.  For those who do not know, my middle child is a hoarder.  She not only pulls out all her toys and doesn't put them away, she keeps trash.  You can't see the carpet in her room because of all the toys and dirty clothes.  Then her drawers and toys boxes and desk are full of trash.  She keeps everything: paper cups from brushing her teeth, chewed bubble gum, boxes, tissues....everything.  And to top it all off, all the clothes from her closet are shoved under her bed.  There is only one lone shirt hanging in her closet!  It is enough to make me want to cry.  Being OCD is hard enough.  Being OCD with a child who is a hoarder is enough to make me question not taking happy pills again.


She has had 2 weeks to clean her room.  I took away tv and her gameboy, nothing.  I took away her blankie and the computer, nothing.  She sat in her room for 6hours yesterday and refused to clean.  I sent her to bed 2 hours before her bed time and told her I was done.  As of today I go in and clean it.  That means I throw away almost everything.  I decide what toys she keeps and which ones get thrown away or donated.  She gets one toy box and only gets to keep what I can fit in it.  Everything else must go.  Once I have decided what she can keep, the toy box gets moved to the basement tv room.  She is not allowed to have any toys in her room any more. 

She of course is very upset and pleading to be given one more chance to clean, but no deal.  I told her I am still on the fence is she will be allowed to go trick or treating tonight.  She needs to learn mommy will not tolerate being lied to (she is constantly lying saying her room is clean until I go and check) and mommy expects rules to be followed and to be respected.  It's a hard lesson to learn but even her teacher is complaining about how messy her desk and bookbag are.  It's time to come down hard and make her realized her laziness and messiness will not be tolerated.

We have a CREEPER!

Today I had to run to the grocery store so Chey stayed home to babysit.  While I was gone some guy pulled up in our drive way, got out of his truck, let his dogs out to pee in our yard, then proceeded to walk around our yard.  He left before Chey was able to get a look at his license plate.  We keep all our doors locked even when we are home and the Chey knows not to open the door for anyone when I am not home.  He never came to the door or rang the doorbell.  

Everything was fine the rest of the day, so I went to my monthly Bunco meeting.  I had to take my friend MJ since she broke her ankle but I made sure I told her husband what happened in case the kids needed him to drive over.  Well wouldn't you know it, half way through Bunco, the creeper came back.  He pulled in the driveway, got out of his truck, stood there for a minute then got back in his truck and left.  Chey's friend came over and picked up the kids and took them back to their house until I could get home.  Gina helped me check all the windows and doors inside and out to make sure nothing was tampered with.

I have no idea who this guy is and what he is up too.  But until I can get a license plate there isn't anything the state troopers can do for us.  So I will be driving the kids to the bus stop in the mornings from now on and just watching to see if he comes back.  Tomorrow I will try to go talk to the few neighbors we have and let them know something strange is going on and to keep an eye out.

It's too cold to be dealing with creepers!

Can I get a snow boy?

Jason has always wanted land.  His idea of a perfect retirement is several acres out in the middle of nowhere with no neighbors.  My idea of a perfect retirement is a condo (preferably in Charleston or near a beach somewhere) where I can walk to shops and trendy restaurants.

Anyway, we move to Alaska and Jason get's exactly what he wants.  It might not be a lot of land, but just shy of two acres isn't bad.  Of course, I get the wonderful task of shoveling the big, long GRAVEL driveway, complete with extra parking for 3!  I am exhausted and it's not like I can walk anywhere to have a nice lunch or cup of coffee.

People have pool boys, can I get a snow boy?  At this rate, I'd settle for a 4-wheeler with a plow on the front!

If my kids were little again, I'd buy these

I have seen it all now!  If my kids were little again, I would so buy these books!

 

It teaches counting with lines like:

1 English village
2 Rich gentlemen
3 Houses

Details:
Mother Goose is doing the undead shuffle!
Every kiddie loves nursery rhymes—even the little ones in advanced state of decay who enjoy chowing down on human viscera. Now the twisted madmen who brought you It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Zombies and Every Zombie Eats Somebody Sometime are eviscerating the beloved poems that once filled our tiny oozing childish brains. This time “Little Miss Muffet Turned on a Tuffet” into something putrid and smelly, and it’s “Three Undead Mice” scampering across our kitchen table. So enjoy these delightful zombie-infused ditties—a feast of gruesome fun for anyone who has ever known, ever been, or ever eaten a child!

R&R is cruel

I know many will disagree with me, but I don't like R&R.  It's cruel.  Those two weeks are such a tease.  It says "this is what you want, look how happy you are, isn't it great" only to turn around and be snatched away with "ha ha, just kidding, you've got another 6-7 months to go."

The next few days/weeks will be tough trying to get the kids (and myself) back to a schedule.  Add in the cold, snow and darkness, sprinkle in some holidays all alone and you have a recipe for a long, miserable winter.